The True Test of Your Character

Since my target audience on this blog is young women, and I know many of you are sisters-as I am one- I have been thinking recently of different ideas for becoming better, kinder, happier sisters.

Our siblings see and know our true character better than anyone else. 

It’s easy to put on a “sweet front” for outside friends, coworkers, or a boyfriend, but our siblings are the ones who know the person we really are.

If you are interested in finding out who you really are, ask the people who see you at your worst.

For a “character test” to gauge where you are in some crucial areas of your character, I encourage you to do the following:

With blank paper and pen, jot down some character qualities you are wondering how you rate in. It could be areas you know you stink in, or some you think you’re doing pretty well in. Whatever the case, write down 4-6 (or all:) of these. An example would be some of the following:

  1. Kindness 
  2. Patience 
  3. Flexibility 
  4. Sweet words
  5. Selflessness 
  6. Love
  7. Happiness 
  8. Grace
  9. Smiling 
  10. Being calm when things go wrong
  11. Respecting parents 
  12. Diligence 
  13. Optimism/being positive 
  14. Speaking well of others

Write your qualities of choice on a small piece of paper, and make one such paper for each of your siblings that are old enough to write and understand (my 9 year old sister would definitely get this). If you want, you can even print them out with explanations underneath for the younger siblings that might not be sure what something like “diligence” means.

Explain to your siblings (together or individually) that you want to be a better sister, and that they can help you do this by telling you the areas you need to get better in. Then give them each a paper and ask them to rate you, on a scale of 1-10 (1 being you do an awful job in said are, and 10 being you do terrific at consistently being ___), for each of the character qualities. (I suggest keeping the papers anonymous so that no one will feel bad for giving you a bad rating!)

Ask them to return the papers to a certain spot when they’re finished (like your room). 

This is going to take some humility, girls! But I promise it will be worth it! And remember, the Lord promises to reward those who humble themselves.

I am planning to do this, too, and will be doing a post next month in follow up. I am hoping lots of you will join me and that together, we will humble ourselves, realize our weaknesses, and ask Jesus to help us be more like Him.

I love you girls!


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  1. I did something similar like this about a year ago… It was very interesting to hear what my sisters thought… definitely a hard pill to swallow to ask them to tell me whatever they thought was negative about me, especially since they’re all younger than me, and probably would never have expected it :). But it really helped me to work on some areas in which I needed to improve. (like being bossy) Although, I’m far from being perfect, it does cause you to reflect more on the way you act, and how your attitude is towards many things. In the end, siblings can really encourage you. I would definitely encourage you to try what Allison suggested! It is definitely worth it, and I’ll probably do it again 🙂

  2. This is a great idea! I definitely want to do this! Thanks for the suggestion! I’ve been struggling with wondering how I’m doing in certain areas and feeling like there is no way to find out. This is such a great idea! Thank you so much!!!

  3. This is such a good idea!! I think I’m going to give it a try and I pray that it helps me be more like Jesus. Thank you so much for sharing it!

  4. This sure is a bowlful of humility!
    I’m even embarrassed to have some one rate me for these past few days. But God help us all love and serve Him and the others around us more. *thanks for the post btw Alli:)

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